Screw the Uterus, I have Money!
by Omega19x
Summary: Through the miracle of modern science, Seto Kaiba becomes pregnant… with a blue eyes white dragon. COMPLETE
1. Screw the rules of human anatomy

[insert disclaimer here: I do not own Yugioh. I do not own Seto Kaiba. But I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.]

...

Being rich has its privileges. It allows you the freedom to do utterly ridiculous things that could easily endanger your reputation, your company or even your life, and escape with little to no consequence.

It was with that attitude that Seto Kaiba walked into White Lightning Laboratories. He was, of course, the research company's chief shareholder, and he provided them with nearly all of their funding. They had been tasked with the seemingly impossible job of recreating the genetic material of a creature that, as far as anyone knew, never actually existed.

But that was all about to change.

"I came as soon as I received your message. You said you made a breakthrough." The door slid open, and the brash, young CEO approached his head geneticist. "I'm dying to see it with my own eyes."

Dr. Wu had been in charge of Project Blue Eyes since its inception four years earlier. He was a brilliant man, if not a somewhat crazy one. But Seto didn't mind. If there was one man in the entire world that could create a real, living Blue Eyes White Dragon, it was him.

"Yes, Mr. Kaiba, sir." He smiled. "This way, please. I think you will be very impressed with our findings."

The facility was as clean as it was sterile. They passed hatcheries, where scientists were studying various birds and reptiles. They passed gene-sequencing laboratories, where various lengths of genetic code were being spliced and reinserted. They passed a library, where a couple of the younger associates were collecting data from mythical and mystical sources. They even passed a small cafeteria, but it was empty. Who in their right mind would want to be seen taking a break when Seto Kaiba pays a visit?

They both finally entered small a room at the end of the hallway. Dr. Wu nodded to his assistant, who took a Petri dish out of the freezer and slid it under a powerful microscope.

"Take a look, Mr. Kaiba. A complete Blue Eyes White Dragon cell."

Seto said nothing as he adjusted the focus on the microscope. When it appeared his employer was content with what he had seen, Dr. Wu simply exchanged it for another of his assistant's frozen specimens.

"This one has successfully divided into two cells. Lee has one that he's isolated at four, and another at sixteen, if you wish to see them, sir."

"You're right. I am impressed. Do you have any fertilized dragon eggs yet?"

Dr. Wu motioned to his assistant.

"We have had several progress to an embryonic stage, but none have survived past a few weeks, Mr. Kaiba." Lee bowed regretfully. "Even the latest specimen, which we implanted in an ostrich egg, did not survive."

"That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. No matter how we incubate, or which eggs we use, the result is the same." Dr. Wu put an uneasy hand on Seto's back. His voice dropped to a soft whisper. "We need a better host. So far, we've been unable to find a compatible animal on which to continue our experiments."

"I have provided you with sufficient funds to acquire any animal you need for this project, no matter how rare. So what's stopping you from using it?"

"It's more of an ethical dilemma, sir." Dr. Wu hesitated.

"I wasn't aware that I paid you to debate ethics."

"Although it is highly dangerous, completely immoral and has the potential to stir up quite the public outcry if we were ever discovered, my team and I believe that it may be necessary to use… human subjects, sir."

"Human subjects?" Seto whispered back. His mind wandered.

"At least with human physiology, we'd have a better chance at supporting the embryo until the developing egg is strong enough to be supported in an incubator. No other animal has been able to stand the stress… Of course, we'd need to secure a death row inmate, or perhaps a homeless girl…"

Seto weighed his options and he smiled.

"I think that can be arranged." he eventually replied. "So tell me, where do I sign?"

"Sign? Mr. Kaiba, I would have assumed you'd want something like that… you know… swept completely under the table…"

"For now, yes. But eventually it's going to headline every newspaper from here to London. And I will not allow anyone else to take credit for bringing the first blue eyes white dragon into the world. The only way to secure that privilege is to volunteer myself, naturally. Now where do I sign?"

Dr. Wu blinked. He looked at Lee. Lee looked at Seto, and then back at Dr. Wu.

"Bur, Mr. Kaiba, this is a completely untested...."

"I don't care."

"Whether we succeed or fail, this is far too dangerous. This experiment could easily kill you!"

"This is a living, breathing blue eyes white dragon we're talking about."

"But sir, there are basic rules of human anatomy that…"

"Screw the rules." Seto scoffed. He hopped onto the lab table, rolled up his black shirt and tugged on his pants. "In case you've forgotten, I do pay your salary."

Now it was Dr. Wu's turn to weigh his options.

If he refused to accept Seto Kaiba as his test subject, he would certainly lose his job. If he did accept Seto as his test subject, and Seto was somehow killed in the process, he would certainly lose his job. Granted, his job might not have been curing cancer, but it did pay the bills rather well, and he did want to keep it. The only way to do that, so he reasoned, was to accept Seto as a test subject, and take the rest as it comes.

After all, the success rate of in vitro fertilization, at best, was only thirty-seven percent. The chance of managing to implant a dragon cell into a woman's uterus was probably less than two percent. And that didn't even consider the chances of the cell developing, or heaven forbid, taking it to what would be considered full term. Those were all close to zero. The chances of successfully implanting it in a man's abdominal cavity… so astronomically low as to border on impossible!

"Lee, please give me specimen 121b." Dr. Wu sighed as he conceded. He took the syringe from his assistant, while Seto leant his signature to a release form that hadn't even been created yet. The needle went through his navel, but he didn't flinch.

"How long do you think I'll have to wait before we'll have a fully developed dragon?"

"I have no earthly idea, Mr. Kaiba…" Dr. Wu shrugged. "I guess you could say… that part is somewhat up to you."


	2. Screw the board meeting

This was virgin territory for the world, and especially for Seto Kaiba, all puns intended. The grand dream of having played a role in the creation of the mythic blue eyes white dragon was still fresh on his mind. The possible consequences of playing such a central role, however, didn't even cross it for at least a week.

He was at his office at the time, preparing for a business meeting regarding the construction of an expansion to KaibaLand. He stood, picking up some papers, and was suddenly struck by a wave of nausea.

"Mr. Kaiba, The gentlemen from Tokyo are here…" his secretary opened the door, surprised at her boss' sudden slumped posture. "Mr. Kaiba, are you all right?"

He shook it off within a matter of moments, but found himself wincing at the stomach cramps it seemed to produce.

"I'm fine." He eventually answered. "I must have eaten something that disagreed with me."

"If you ask me, it's that jerky, sir." The secretary retrieved his papers for him. "That stuff always makes me feel queasy."

He just glanced at her, puzzled.

"Well, you've been grazing on it almost non-stop for the past few days." She added. "I haven't seen you take an actual lunch break since Tuesday."

"I've been extremely busy."

"Believe me, I know. When you work overtime. I work overtime, sir."

He followed her down the hallway, a little slower than usual. He was surprised at how tired he suddenly felt.

"Perhaps you should take the rest of the day off…"

"Excuse me?" she blinked, wondering if she could have possibly heard what she thought she heard from a man who's prone to working overtime on Christmas Eve.

"After this meeting, I'm going home." He clarified, taking the papers from her. "You can stay if you really want to. I don't particularly care."

He straightened up, pushed the doors open, and disappeared into his boardroom. His secretary simply stood at the doorway, mouth agape. She couldn't remember the last time she got to take a vacation. The thought of buying him more jerky was sounding better and better all the time.

Fortunately for Seto Kaiba, the meeting was short and to the point. The land he was looking to acquire for his park was undeveloped. He acquired the deeds with few arguments, without any need for underhanded tactics, threats or coercion. And when it was over, he was quickly out the door.

He stepped into his limousine, hoping his impromptu meeting with Dr. Wu would go the same way.


	3. Screw the pregnancy test

Seto arrived at White Lightning Laboratories in less than ten minutes, and instructed his driver to circle around, rather than wait. He walked the halls with a mix of anticipation and anxiety, both of those feelings only increasing when he finally ran into Lee.

"Mr. Kaiba? We weren't expecting another visit for quite some time."

"I think something's happening."

It took a moment for the lab assistant to realize exactly what he meant. He cautiously put a hand over Seto's black shirt, almost expecting it to be slapped away. It wasn't. But he didn't exactly feel anything out of the ordinary either.

"Are you sure?"

"Given that I've never exactly experienced the miracle of pregnancy, no. I'm not completely sure. But…" another wave of nausea struck him. He almost fell over. "I think I need to sit down for a minute."

Lee nodded. He quickly ushered Seto into one of the adjacent rooms while he paged Dr. Wu. He took a sample of Seto's blood, though he wasn't even sure whether a normal pregnancy test would even be possible. Human chorionic gonadotropin, maybe, but a rosette inhibition assay for early pregnancy factor seemed almost out of the question for more than obvious reasons. For now, they would have to rely on what Seto could tell them.

"Mr. Kaiba, what exactly are you feeling?"

"It's been happening all day…" Seto slumped in the chair, waiting for the sick feeling to pass. "Feeling nauseated, tired. It's hard to explain. Something's going on inside me. Something different."

"All right…" Lee took detailed notes of everything he could measure. Dr. Wu listened through the door for a couple of minutes before finally coming in. It took several deep breaths to prepare him for the fact that, against impossible odds, he might have actually made medical history. Or at least, he was about as prepared as he was going to get.

"Is this what it's supposed to feel like? To have the blue eyes white dragon growing inside me?"

"It's possible, Mr. Kaiba." Dr. Wu replied, as he closed the door behind him. "Of course, there may be other reasons for your symptoms. Time will tell us that. But for now, we have to assume that the experiment may have actually been a success."

Part of Seto was even more anxious than before. But another part of him was unbearably excited. So much so, he actually smiled.

"Then what should I do?"

Dr. Wu sighed. He wished he had better advice to give.

"You are going to take each day as it comes." He eventually replied. "When my wife was expecting, her doctor told her to listen to her body. If she felt hungry, eat. If she felt fatigued, rest. You should do the same."

"We'll run whatever tests we can." Lee added.

"And we need to make sure you're still healthy. We don't know how long you're going to be able to carry the dragon. We may need to…" Dr. Wu chose his words carefully, "abort the experiment."

"We're not aborting anything." Seto insisted. "I was healthy enough to defeat Gozaburo Kaiba in chess when I was ten. I was healthy enough to take over his company when I was just sixteen. And I can count the number of times I've lost at duel monsters on one hand. Obviously, I can handle something like this."

"Of course, Mr. Kaiba." Dr. Wu nodded respectfully. "But you should have medical personnel with you at all times, just in case. We can have you admitted under a pseudonym. I have colleagues with whom I can call in favors. Neither of us wish to see you lose your life over this."

"This is a blue eyes white dragon. I don't believe there's anyone who knows more about them then you."

"Genetically, biologically, yes. That may be true. But I am no physician."

"Your assistant did a short residency at Uno Hospital, under the direction of a Dr. Takeru Shogi, did he not?" Seto looked over at Lee, who was busy making notes.

"Yes, Mr. Kaiba. I did, sir." Lee replied, looking up from his folders. "But that was years ago, before I changed my focus to genomics and molecular biology."

"Your selection by Dr. Wu suggests that you're skilled in a wide variety of disciplines." Seto shot him the kind of glare often followed by pink slips, if not death itself. "Are you saying that's not the case?"

"No, Mr. Kaiba." Lee stuttered.

"Then it's settled. I'll call you in the morning to make the arrangements."

Dr. Wu let out a breath he didn't even realize he'd been holding.

"All right, Mr. Kaiba. If you insist…"


	4. Screw the statistics

Seto Kaiba rode home with one important thing on his mind. The dragon was alive. So far, so good. While no one knew what the exact result of this experiment might be, Seto at least knew what he had to do next.

It wouldn't be long before he could no longer keep his role in the matter a secret. And there was one very important person that needed to find out before the press ever did – his younger brother, Mokuba.

"Big brother! You're home early!" Mokuba grinned from ear to ear when the door to the mansion opened. On any normal day, he would have leapt into his brother's arms. But this time, he stopped a few feet short. "Wait a second... You're home early. You're never home early… Are you okay? You look a little flushed. Should I call the doctor?"

"No, Mokuba. I've been talking with Dr. Wu for most of the afternoon."

"Dr. Wu? Isn't he that guy you brought on for Project Blue Eyes? You'd only be meeting with him if…" Mokuba glanced up. His brother seemed altogether pleased with something, and that could only mean… "They made a breakthrough?? They actually made a blue eyes white dragon?! Can I see it, big brother? Will you take me to go see it?!"

"You're looking at it."

Mokuba blinked.

"Where?"

"Here." Seto gently traced a line over his shirt. "And it's not quite a dragon yet. But it will be. I'll explain over dinner. God, I'm starving."

On Seto's orders, the chefs pulled out the largest slab of steak they could find. And he tore into it like he hadn't eaten in three days. Mokuba watched him with a strange mix of fascination and apprehension, waiting until he'd almost finished before he opened his mouth again.

"So you're… pregnant? Is this for real?"

"Yes. It's for real." Seto answered, ripping meat from the bone.

"But how?" Mokuba finally asked. "You're a boy, for one. And it's a dragon! How does that even work?!"

"The embryo was implanted in my abdominal cavity. It obviously latched onto one of the nearby organs, and is starting to grow and develop." Seto answered as plainly as he could. In those terms, it actually seemed plausible. "It's rare, but the same thing can happen in women, and with human babies."

Of course, Seto deliberately avoided any statistics on how many of those extremely rare pregnancies get carried to term and how few, if any, actually survive. As far as he was concerned, those statistics got thrown out the window the minute he chose to become a statistic of his own.

"But this… this is a dragon!"

"A blue eyes white dragon." Seto corrected him quickly.

Mokuba was silent for a few minutes. In the meantime, Seto licked all the bones clean, and stacked them neatly on the platter. Only then did he lean back in the chair, finally satisfied.

"Does this mean I'm going to be an uncle?" Mokuba finally asked.

"You could look at it that way." Seto smiled back.

"… cool."

Seto was pleased that Mokuba took the news so well. Even with Lee visiting every day, the next few weeks would have been very difficult, if not impossible, without Mokuba's help.

There were good days and there were bad days. And unfortunately, neither of them could predict in advance whether it was going to be a good or a bad day. Going to the main office was a chore he quickly abandoned in favor of telecommuting and conference calls. On some days, even that was neglected all together.

Tending to the needs of the developing blue eyes white dragon was an exhausting job, perhaps even more exhausting than running a billion-dollar corporation. He was frequently tired, and slept often. When he was awake, his days were marked with alternating episodes of binging and purging.

The press would have had a field day if they knew about that.

Seto's hunger was often ravenous, a testament to the beast that was literally growing inside him. He craved meat, as fresh as he could get it. He probably would have even eaten it raw, had he been able to convince the chefs to serve it to him. Thankfully, they wouldn't.

He also discovered that morning sickness did not have to occur in the morning at all. The nausea, the cramping, the pain could happen at any time, day or night. He spent countless hours on the bathroom floor, and Mokuba was by his side for almost every one of them.

But despite all of that, Seto was adapting better than Lee could have imagined. No other animal had been able to carry the dragon this long. Some aborted naturally, but most actually died in the process. For the most part, Seto Kaiba's body seemed to handling the additional stress.

It was quite an amazing feat. It was one month down and, according to Dr. Wu's calculations, probably another four or five to go.


	5. Screw the ultrasound

Seto lay on the lab table. His shirt was tossed over the side of a nearby chair. There was an ultrasound machine in the corner, and although only a month had passed, everyone was interested in getting at least some look at the developing blue eyes white dragon.

Despite all of Seto's bizarre symptoms, it was, technically speaking, still speculation at this point.

Dr. Wu put his hand on Seto's abdomen. It was actually somewhat firm to the touch, with only a slight bulge. To the untrained eye, it looked like he had put on a few pounds over a long vacation. But given the CEO's normally thin physique, and what he was actually dealing with, Dr. Wu found it a little unsettling.

Seto squirmed a little when Lee spread the cold gel over his stomach, but quickly turned his full attention to the monitor.

At first, they saw nothing in the black and white scratches. The picture was too grainy, and a thin white haze blanketed everything. But when Lee applied a little pressure, they could see a faint outline of something underneath the haze. That 'something' looked vaguely reptilian. Most notable of all, it had a heartbeat. Their speculations and their suspicions had been confirmed. They now had irrefutable evidence that the world's first blue eyes white dragon was very much alive.

"Congratulations, Mr. Kaiba,, you've certainly done it." Dr. Wu finally announced. Lee helped Seto sit up and wipe off the gel. "Not only is the dragon alive, but you've lasted a week and a half longer than any other host. How are you feeling today?"

"All right… so far." He answered begrudgingly. "I spent most of yesterday in face down defense mode in front of the john. Might be doing it again later."

"There's jerky in the limo, Seto. Do you want me to get you something to eat?" Mokuba interrupted.

"No, not right now. Believe me, this afternoon, I'll probably eat it all and still have room for a 72 oz. slab of beef."

"Have you been taking the multivitamins too?" Lee interrupted. He readied a syringe and drew a sample of blood for further testing.

"Yes."

"Blood levels of iron, vitamin B-12, and folic acid were very low yesterday. Not as low as last week, but still bordering on anemic. No matter how much I give you, the levels are still slowly dropping."

"Any other changes, Lee?"

"Just a few. Low grade fever, but that's been relatively consistent. Blood glucose levels have dropped a bit, but it's nothing to be concerned about." He cross-referenced several different tables and charts. "Everything is now lower than it should be, even with the extra vitamins. Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if you're eating for two, and the dragon pretty much gets it all."

Dr. Wu nodded, turning back to Seto.

"It would explain the increased appetite, as well as the increased fatigue you've been experiencing since the beginning."

Seto simply nodded. His stomach answered with a fierce growl, and a wave of nausea followed.

"And you certainly need to be taking it easy. It may be small right now, but it takes a lot out of you."

"Don't worry. I've been making sure he gets plenty of rest, Dr. Wu." Mokuba answered proudly. He'd even gone so far as to take the battery out of his older brother's laptop and hide it.

"He's right." Seto added, almost ashamed to admit it. "There's only one more project I've left on my calendar, and for good reason."

"What project is that, Mr. Kaiba?"

'The upcoming Duel Monsters tournament, of course."

Dr. Wu exchanged an anxious glance with Lee. The latter finally spoke.

"With all due respect, Mr. Kaiba, I think the stress of a tournament would be a bit much right now, even for someone like you."

"Nonsense." Seto laughed a little. He stroked his stomach. "For the first time in history, there will be four blue eyes white dragons on the dueling field! And I have a very special press conference scheduled before the opening ceremonies. It's about time we share our little discovery with the world."

Dr. Wu wanted to protest, but he knew it would be hopeless. Seto Kaiba was a master of public displays. And this project would be launched like all his other technological breakthroughs – with all the pomp and circumstance he could muster.

"All right. All right." Dr. Wu eventually replied. "But until then, let's all just try to focus on having a discovery to announce, okay?"

"Of course." Seto replied, a grin tightening around his face.

For the next few weeks, Seto remained in good spirits. As the days went on, the morning sickness started to subside. The ravenous cravings eventually did as well, leaving behind a mix of mild heartburn and occasional indigestion. The dragon, meanwhile, continued to thrive.

Project Blue Eyes was, so far, a success. And he was determined to make his big announcement a success as well.


	6. Screw the press conference

Domino Stadium was the only venue large enough to hold the tournament, and tickets sold out within the first twenty minutes. Mokuba smiled as he watched the fans fill into the stadium via closed-circuit cameras.

Yugi Muoto was favored to win the tournament, but a few carefully placed rumors were enough to get the crowd talking about something else. – Seto Kaiba was opening the tournament with a special press conference. Seto Kaiba was unveiling a technological accomplishment so incredible that the world would never be the same. Seto Kaiba was about to make history.

But for now, they were all just trying to savor the calm before the storm.

Seto had spent the past couple of hours asleep on the green room's couch, his hand protectively covering his exposed stomach. Dr. Wu and Lee watched over him, but didn't want to wake him yet. They both knew that Seto needed all the rest he could get if he were going to compete at a level anywhere close to his own high standards.

Seto's traditional dueling outfit left a lot to be desired, but he was wearing it anyway. His pants barely fastened below the noticeably protruding egg, and the Kaiba Corporation belt had been discarded. His shirt, which he normally tucked in, didn't quite reach. But despite all that, the large white trench coat still looked like it could swallow the rest of him whole. The sight was unusual, to say the least.

"Big brother?" Mokuba nudged Seto's shoulder. "It's almost time to get up…"

He groaned a little, and Mokuba nudged him again. His eyes opened groggily, and he rubbed them a few times.

"Are you sure you're up to this, Mr. Kaiba?" Dr. Wu whispered.

It only took a minute for the fire to light in Seto's eyes.

"Of course I'm sure." He pushed himself from the couch, making a mental check of his deck and his notes. "How much time before the opening ceremonies?"

"One hour and fifteen minutes." Mokuba answered.

He nodded silently, and waved for the others to follow.

From the moment the gates opened, all eyes and all cameras were pointed at him. The whispers in the crowd echoed like a dull roar, and then faded into silence. Nobody blinked. He took the stage, and then took the microphone. The master of ceremonies, as shocked as everyone else, completely forgot what he was supposed to announce.

"Given the silence, I assume I need no introduction." Seto began. "But before you finalize the headlines for tomorrow morning's tabloids, let me assure you that I have not let myself go. No… I am playing a role in the greatest scientific discovery in our time."

The crowd followed his every move. Not wanting to hide behind the podium, he decided to lean against it instead.

"Several years ago, Kaiba Corporation began funding the newly formed White Lightning Laboratories. Their greatest challenge was Project Blue Eyes – a resurrection of the greatest creature in all of Duel Monsters. Not on a card. Not merely in a hologram. But a real, living, blue eyes white dragon. And as you can see… we were largely successful."

Dr. Wu took to the podium, explaining the experiment in great detail. The evidence, in the form of raw data, gene sequences, and even ultrasound video, played behind him on a large screen. When he was finished, he nodded to Seto, who then opened the floor to the press for questions.

The press jumped at the chance.

"Mr. Kaiba, why you?" one reporter asked. "Why not someone else? Why not a woman?"

"A task like this requires a strong body and an even stronger will. This is a blue eyes white dragon. So, obviously, I was the only logical candidate."

"There is no evidence to believe a natural womb would produce better results." Dr. Wu added on top of Seto's response. "The dragon egg is successfully developing inside his abdominal cavity. A ectopic pregnancy, if you will. It's extremely dangerous, but it does work."

"How dangerous?"

"That is not my concern." Seto answered immediately. "And it shouldn't be any of yours."

"Mr. Kaiba, have you considered the ethical ramifications of this decision? This creature is only rumored to exist, and you plan to bring it into…"

"Don't care. Next question."

"You are working on plans for KaibaLand. Will this dragon be a spectacle at the park?"

"What happens after the dragon is born, and what appearances it will make, will be decided at a later time. Next."

"Mr. Kaiba, Dr. Wu, you're recreating a creature that is not natural to this ecosystem. How do you intend to provide for its basic needs? Do you even know what food it eats? What habitat it should live in?"

"Our team has been researching this extensively. We are confident that we can create an environment where the dragon will continue to thrive."

"And believe me, I think I'm already very familiar with what this particular blue eyes likes to eat." Seto added. "We are quite attached at the moment."

"Dr. Wu, you said this has been your most successful experiment. Were there previous ones? Other dragon embryos that did not survive?"

"We conducted several experiments involving various reptiles, working with their eggs in an incubator. None of them survived beyond a few weeks. This egg has survived for two months."

"What would be the normal gestation period? How long before the actual dragon is born?"

"We cannot pinpoint it exactly. We suspect another two to three months." Dr. Wu answered, and pointed to another reporter.

"Mr. Kaiba, can you handle the stress of another two to three months? You don't look particularly well right now."

"I assure you, I am perfectly capable of handling…" Seto put his hand on the podium. A wave of dizziness swept over him, and the crowd blurred. "I am perfectly capable of… of handling…"

Everything suddenly went black. And Seto Kaiba just dropped.


	7. Screw the fainting spell

Lee dove to the ground, catching the limp body of the CEO in his arms.

"Seto!!" Mokuba shouted.

"Mr. Kaiba!"

The crowd gasped and the cameras zoomed in. Lee felt for vital signs, eventually nodding to Dr. Wu. Seto Kaiba had fainted. His pulse, though, was racing. His body was quite warm to the touch, but he hadn't even broken a sweat.

On Lee's order, Mokuba radioed for the circling helicopter to land on the dueling field. In a matter of minutes, it had lifted off again with Lee and the Kaiba brothers aboard.

Dr. Wu was stuck with the tremendously unpleasant task of trying to end the press conference. All he could really do was repeatedly try to assure the dueling world that he had not just killed Seto Kaiba. But it looked like he was just left to take the fall. The competing duelists, meanwhile, were granted a short reprieve. And one very lucky individual would be making it to the next round of the tournament unscathed. Seto Kaiba would not be returning to compete.

By the time he awoke to the sterile smell of a hospital room, the tournament was over.

"Big brother!!" Mokuba shouted. He draped his arms as best he could over Seto's body. "Oh thank goodness… We were so worried!"

Seto groaned, and looked around. Lee was standing over him as well.

"I had to pull a lot of strings with my old boss, but we were able to get you checked in without much of a media circus." He added. "I know you wanted to avoid hospitals, but the dragon pushed you far beyond what you can handle on your own. Or even what I can handle."

Suddenly, Seto's eyes grew wide. His hands flew down to his abdomen, surprised that the dragon egg was still there. He only now realized that he was wrapped in all sorts of wires, with different instruments measuring both his vitals and the dragon's. There was also a series of IV lines going into a major vessel on the side his neck.

"Is it…"

"It's all right." Lee was quick to reassure him. "I don't think your little fainting spell had much of an effect on the dragon. We still detect a heartbeat, and it's perked up quite a bit in the last couple of hours."

Only then did the exhausted Seto Kaiba slump back against the stack of pillows.

"One minute I was feeling all right, and the next…"

"You fainted, Mr. Kaiba." Lee continued. He glanced at Mokuba for a moment, and wondered if he should even continue. He also wondered if he really had a choice. "You were severely dehydrated. And given your latest blood workup, malnourished as well. You should consider yourself lucky that all you did was faint."

"I'm… tired." Seto chose his words carefully. He closed his eyes, but he was still very much awake.

"Mr. Kaiba, I don't want you to focus on what happened at your press conference, but you need to make a decision. I don't know how long you'll be able to keep this up, even under medical supervision. At what point are you willing to abort…"

"Never." His eyes snapped open. "I've come this far, and I don't intend on quitting."

"Mr. Kaiba, please…"

"No." he insisted. And if glares could kill, Lee would have been on the floor in under a second.

"Very well." Lee sighed, watching Seto close his eyes again, this time with the intent to fall asleep. "Rest. You're going to need it."


	8. Screw the bed rest

Yugi Mouto may have won the tournament, but he was yesterday's news.

If there was one thing Seto Kaiba was a master at, it was holding the attention of the media. For the last few days, video of the press conference played back on every major news station. Some were heralding it as the greatest discovery ever made. Others simply called it the controversy of the century. A few were still holding onto the delusion that it was only a hoax, but that wouldn't last too much longer.

In the midst of it all, Seto had a safe haven from the constantly prying eyes of the press. It wasn't easy, but Mokuba made sure that no uninvited guests ever made it past security. Dr. Wu, on the other hand, wasn't so lucky. It took him three hours just to get from his car to the elevator. And when he finally did make it upstairs, he was more exhausted than the one in the hospital bed!

"I swear, Mr. Kaiba. They're like vultures!" He closed the door firmly behind him and changed his tone of voice. "How are you feeling today, sir?"

Seto glanced up from his book. It was one of several that Lee had brought that morning from the White Lightning Laboratories library.

"Better." He admitted, marking his place and closing the book. "For the most part."

"And the last round of tests suggests the same thing." Lee inserted. "For the dragon as well. We've seen marked growth, even in the last few days. "

"That's good." Dr. Wu walked to Seto's bedside. He pulled down the blanket and put a hand on Seto's abdomen. The egg itself was still a bit soft to the touch, and he could almost feel the back of the dragon against his palm. "Now, what do you mean, for the most part?"

"I appreciate the reading material, don't get me wrong. But I think you both underestimate the ability of someone to die from boredom."

"Mr. Kaiba, we've been through this already. None of us are going to permit you to sign yourself out against doctor's orders. Even if you think you've fully recovered from your fainting spell, there are still too many unknowns."

"That's right." Lee agreed. "We made it through the first half of this pregnancy with only a few surprises. The second half could be quite different, sir. And when those surprises arise, this is the only place where we can handle them appropriately."

"I know. I'm not about to jeopardize that." He insisted. He put a hand over the egg, stroking it tenderly. "But unless you can think of a good reason to confine me to bed rest, then don't."

Dr. Wu exchanged an uneasy glance with Lee.

"You just want to get up and walk around? I suppose that would be all right…" Lee eventually replied.

Dr. Wu gulped.

"Well, sir. You see… Mokuba said…"

"That there are security personnel at every entrance to the wing, correct?" Seto didn't wait for any answers. He immediately undid the strap and peeled the sensors from his abdomen one at a time. The monitor, which had been recording the dragon's heart rate, went blank. "I should therefore be able to leave the room without being bothered."

Lee, meanwhile, leant a hand to Seto, hoping that he'd take it and simply leave the rest of the IV lines in place. Thankfully, he did.

"But, Mr. Kaiba, sir. I think that first you should…"

"I think I've rested long enough." Seto glanced at Lee, who had already taken his unspoken cue to move the IV rack toward the door. Seto strode close behind, the long hospital gown billowing out behind him like one of his trademarked trenchcoats.

Lee opened the door, and they both walked out of the room. Dr. Wu followed quickly behind.

"Mr. Kaiba, what I was trying to say is that Mokuba…" they turned the corner. Seto and Lee both froze, and Dr. Wu stumbled right into his assistant.

The small nook at the end of the hall was draped in blue and white streamers. The ceiling was blanketed in balloons. Gifts of various sizes had been stacked on the tables. And every chair was filled with a familiar body – Yugi. Jonouchi. Honda. Anzu. Otogi. Bakura, and standing proudly in the center of them all was his younger brother, Mokuba.

They all looked up at the same time. What started as a moment of silence ended in a roar of laughter.

"… Mr. Kaiba, that's what I was trying to warn you about." Dr. Wu whispered timidly. "Mokuba's been planning a surprise for you and… um… You might want to at least put on some pants."


	9. Screw the baby shower

It took an hour of cajoling before the door to Seto Kaiba's private hospital room opened again. And even then, it was solely the result of not wanting to disappoint Mokuba. He had obviously worked on his little surprise party for days. While Seto may have been immune to most persuasion tactics, very few could stand up to the power of his little brother's guilt-wrenching wibble.

The others seemed willing to forgive his initial entrance, and this time, sat silently as he made his way down the hall. Only Jonouchi muffled a snicker, and Honda quickly elbowed him. True, he found the idea of a pregnant Seto Kaiba waddling down the hallway in a mismatched combination of ill-fitting scrubs and an over-sized hospital gown absolutely hilarious. But he at least had the decency not to show it.

Everyone else just stared.

Seto held onto the egg as he lowered himself into the last remaining chair. He was surprisingly out of breath from the walk.

"Well?" he sputtered as he huffed.

The questions came at him with a fury.

"Is it actually true? Are you really pregnant?"

"Are you okay?"

"What's it like to have a dragon egg inside you?"

"Does it hurt?"

"Do you know if it's a boy dragon or a girl dragon yet?"

"Do you get weird cravings? My sister used to crave pickles."

"When are you due?"

"How is that thing going to come out? You can't exactly lay it, right?"

"Can I touch it?"

Seto waited until they all stopped talking at once. He took as deep a breath as he could.

"Yes. I am. I feel peachy, and if you believe that, I have virtual swampland to sell you in Indonesia. It's… you don't really want to know that. Sometimes, yes, it does hurt. It hurts right now. No, I don't know whether it's a boy or a girl and I don't think we'll be able to tell until it hatches. You have no idea. I've probably got about two more months, but we can't know for sure. And, of course not, mutt. Stop being a moron. It's going to require surgery."

"I knew that." Jonouchi glanced around. This earned him another soft elbow from Honda. There was still one more question on the table and Seto Kaiba paused for almost a minute before he answered it.

"… All right… If suppose you can touch it."

He pulled open the flaps of the hospital gown, revealing the round, swollen abdomen underneath. Ryou, always the curious one when it came to otherworldly phenomenon, went first. Seto rolled his eyes, but didn't flinch.

"It's… soft…" Ryou mumbled. He hadn't expected that.

Now, everyone else was curious as well.

"Woah, that doesn't feel natural…"

"I thought eggs were supposed to be hard." Honda pressed gently on Seto's left side.

"Dr. Wu said the actual shell will start to harden up more when the dragon inside is finished growing." Mokuba answered. "But for now…"

"For now, just be careful." Seto grunted. He pointedly closed the gown. "And I think that's quite enough of that."

"Well, you had us all really worried at that press conference." Yugi added. "So when Mokuba called and said he wanted to throw you a baby shower, of course, we said yes."

"So go ahead, big brother! Open up your presents!"

Seto glanced over at Mokuba. The boy was already juggling three boxes, trying his best not to drop them.

"All right. All right." He sighed, taking the first gift off the stack. Although he tried his best to remain aloof, he couldn't hide the thin smile that crossed his lips. Maybe it was one of those pregnancy mood swings, he thought to himself, but this was actually a nice surprise.

"Who's it from?" Mokuba asked, peeking at the tag on the side.

"This one is from Otogi and Honda." Seto read the tag, and proceeded to peel back the wrapping paper. Inside the box was set of three large baby bottles.

"We weren't exactly sure what you'd have to feed a newborn dragon." Otogi shrugged. "But we hoped these would be the right size."

"They're the same kind that are used to feed calves."

Seto studied them for a moment and set them aside. Those could prove to be very useful.

"Thank you."

Before he could lean over to pick up another box, Mokuba had passed him one.

"This one's from Yugi, big brother." He smiled. "And so are these."

Setting their constant rivalry aside for at least one more hour, Seto unwrapped the first present. It was a build-it-yourself feeding table, complete with metal bowls. The other boxes contained a mix of toys generally reserved for large dogs.

"The pet store's never seen a dragon before, but I thought you might want some toys for it to play with when it gets older. And the table's from Grandpa. He thought it might make it easier for you."

"… it might." Seto nodded. The thought of feeding the dragon was actually making him a little hungry. "If nothing else, the metal dishes will be easier to clean."

"Here's one from me. It's fragile, so be careful." Ryou passed a large box to Mokuba, who in turn, passed it to Seto. "If dragons are cold-blooded like other reptiles, they're going to need a good heat source. So I got you a whole box of special full spectrum light bulbs. They give off a greater spectrum of light than regular broad-spectrum bulbs, and that's essential for keeping reptiles healthy. Amane learned that the hard way when she started keeping snakes…"

"Even though I have ample space outdoors for my dragon to get plenty of natural sunlight, these are probably going to come in very handy."

"And there's a pair of chain mail gloves in there too." Ryou smiled. "I made them myself, as part of my latest live action role playing campaign. But you probably need them more than I do."

Seto thanked him, and soon found another gift in his hands, in the form of a small envelope.

"Mine's more for you… not the dragon." Anzu blushed. "I really wasn't sure what to get at first… but I figured after everything you're going through, you'd probably want this."

He peeled open the envelope.

"A Mother's Day Out gift card to the spa?" Seto blinked.

Jonouchi, Honda and Otogi all burst out laughing. Yugi and Ryou, however, thought the idea was rather cute. Mokuba was caught somewhere in between, and his face turned a bright shade of red.

"You know… to relax. My boss said that when she had her first kid, her back was killing her. So carrying an egg has got to be a huge strain."

"I'll keep that in mind." Seto passed the envelope to Mokuba. He was rather cold in his response to Anzu, refusing to admit that she was absolutely correct, but the look in his eyes betrayed him. It just screamed, 'Don't you dare lose this one! Not only am I going to use it, but I'm probably going to buy the whole damn spa! I have money, so I can do that sort of thing.'

"There's one more. And it's from Jonouchi."

He shook the box.

"This isn't a leash or something, is it, Mutt?"

"No. Just open it!" Jonouchi growled under his breath.

Seto did. When they all saw the pacifier inside, Seto wasn't the only one who raised an eyebrow.

"What?" Jonouchi looked around, ignoring the odd looks. "It's a binky. Everyone needs a binky."

"I'm having a dragon, not a little kid."

"Well, you might need a binky!"

"Trust me. It's not going to need, or want, this pathetic little pacifier."

"You don't know that!"

"Hey… Hey!" Anzu suddenly stepped between them. Knowing there was only one way to diffuse this situation peacefully, she quickly pulled out a knife. "That's all the presents. Now, who wants cake?"


	10. Screw the stretch marks

The rest of the dragon shower was relatively tame.

Despite being the pregnant one, Seto only ate about a third the amount of cake that Mokuba did. Isono arrived to take all the gifts, including the binky, back to the mansion. And last, but not least, Anzu pulled out a book of old wives tales, determined to figure out whether the dragon was going to be a boy or a girl. After about twenty minutes, the inquisition was over, and the test revealed a 55% chance of a girl versus a 45% chance of a boy. The test, unfortunately, had over a 5% margin of error.

Even though Seto enjoyed himself, he still found the festivities exhausting. And he was more than a little relieved to head back to his private room to rest again.

The rest of the week was spent in constant consultation with Dr. Wu. He and Lee were both beginning to have doubts as to whether Seto or the dragon would have lasted much longer outside of the hospital. With the constant supply of intravenous nutrition, both were now relatively stable and the dragon's growth rate had picked up considerably.

Seto couldn't deny it either.

It surprised Dr. Wu, but Seto wasn't overly concerned with stretch marks, his expanding waistline, or even the discomfort the egg was causing him. Perhaps it was all those years of caring for Mokuba, but Seto Kaiba possessed an unusual amount of maternal instinct. He wanted only the best for his Blue Eyes, and was willing to put up with whatever he had to in order to make it happen.

"The circumference of the egg has grown another eight inches this week, Mr. Kaiba." Lee reported. "While you know we can't be completely sure of anything at this point, that would suggest that it's continuing to grow and develop."

"And the more it can develop, the better chances of survival." Dr. Wu added.

"Good." Seto answered.

He rubbed the egg gently. Feeling his skin stretching like that was uncomfortable.

"How much growth do you think is still left?" he looked back up at the doctor and his assistant.

"We found several scrolls indicating the relative sizes of dragon eggs." Lee answered. "I'll bring copies of them to you tomorrow."

"The measurements weren't exact, so we can't know for sure. It may very well double in size, but certainly nothing more than that."

Seto's hand froze, and his eyes grew about double their size. For the first time, he wondered if he really could go all the way through with it. He shook his head, and with it, sent that delusion of failure out of his mind. Seto Kaiba does not fail at anything – not card games, not business, and certainly not pregnancy.

"Mr. Kaiba?"

"Nothing I can't handle." He scoffed, but again his eyes betrayed him.

"On the contrary, it might be. But do keep in mind, not all human babies are carried to term. Premature labor occurs in 12% of all pregnancies. And even in babies delivered as early as 24 weeks still have a 50% survival rate."

"Those statistics don't apply to me, so don't waste your breath." Seto growled. "At what point will my Blue Eyes have developed enough to survive and hatch?"

"We don't know for sure, sir."

"You've been saying that a lot lately."

"We do believe, though, that we can predict the end of term when it gets closer." Lee offered sheepishly. "You see, when the growth rate slows down, the egg should start to harden up a little. That's the mother dragon's signal to lay it."

"Somewhere between now and that point, there is likely a critical stage where the dragon would survive prematurely." Dr. Wu added. "We're just not sure where it is."

Seto thought silently for a moment.

"Then my goal will be to get through as many days as I possibly can with the egg still inside of me."

"Yes." The doctors both agreed. "And we'll take the rest as it comes."

"Then it's settled." Seto clapped his hands together. "Dr. Wu?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Is the press still camping outside?"

"Of course. I couldn't even get to my car last night. I ended up sleeping downstairs on a table in the nurses' lounge."

"Find Mokuba. Have him hand-pick a few journalists for exclusive interviews. One at a time."

"Are you sure you're up to that, Mr. Kaiba?"

"More up to it now than I'm going to be in a couple weeks, wouldn't you agree?"


	11. Screw the drugs

The journalists were hysterical. Mokuba's selection process was like playing duel monsters on a roulette wheel. Only the respectable publications were offered a chance, and only the best duelists among them won a coveted interview spot. For those that decked their competition in more ways than one, it was like winning the lottery. This was a story that could literally make or break their career.

Maybe it was the mood swings, but Seto savored every moment of it. And the journalists hung on his every word. He assured the world that both he and the dragon were, in fact, alive and well. And he promised a full press conference, baby dragon in tow, in a few months.

By the end of the week, he had the top headlines in the Kyoto Shimbun and the Weekly Post. He had the cover of TIME Magazine. And unfortunately, he also had an unflattering picture in one of the tabloids, painting him as a dying cancer patient riddled with a massive tumor.

Mokuba was furious, but Seto was a little more reserved. His team of lawyers could handle a run-of-the-mill character defamation lawsuit. And he had much bigger things to concern himself with anyway – namely the growing dragon egg.

The next few weeks went by exactly as Dr. Wu and Lee had predicted. They were increasingly difficult, and the doctors could offer little in the way of solutions for fear they might kill the developing dragon. So, while Seto may have been able to afford every drug known to man, he was pretty much was left with finding his own ways to deal with the incredible discomfort of pregnancy.

Thankfully, he did have one thing money couldn't buy - Mokuba.

"I'm back!" the boy came running in the room. "And I brought more lotion. Do you want me to rub it over the egg, now?"

Seto was lying in bed at the time, but he wasn't asleep. About the only comfortable position was on his left side, so he stayed there for most of the day. Sleep was increasingly elusive, and he lost more of it to pain than he ever did to his company.

"Gods. Yes…" he groaned.

A shaky, sweaty hand clutched the bed railing in search of much-needed support. Mokuba held it as best he could.

A moment of silence passed.

"You're doing great." Mokuba finally whispered, squeezing his brother's hand. "Lee said so too. Blood pressure's a little high, but he isn't worried to the point that he's pacing down the hallway again. You in a lot of pain?"

"No, it's a walk in the park." Seto rolled his eyes. His other hand clutched the egg. "Mokuba, it feels like it's ripping me apart…"

Technically, it was. The skin over his stomach was stretched to its limit and beyond. The large stretch marks were evidence of that. His skin was constantly tearing, sometimes healing, and then tearing again.

Mokuba squirted some of the lotion into his hands, and started massaging around the discolored streaks. Relief all but washed over Seto Kaiba's face and he let his shoulders slump into the pillow. For a little while, at least, he was distracted from the pain.

"… thank you…"

"Oh, it's no trouble at all, big brother!" Mokuba smiled. "You'd be doing this for me if I was…"

"Mokuba, you are not, do you hear me, NOT allowed to let a team of scientists impregnate you and grow a dragon in your abdominal cavity."

"I was going to say, 'in pain' but okay..." Mokuba bit back a laugh. Seto's bark was far worse than his bite right now. "I won't follow in your footsteps. At least until I'm eighteen!"

"Mokuba…"

"I'm kidding! I'm kidding!" he laughed, watching the corners of Seto's mouth turn up in a short smile.

"Good."

"So… can I name it?" Mokuba asked after another long pause.

"Tell you what…" Seto groaned. "Let's make it a game. If it's a girl dragon, you can name it. If it's a boy dragon, I get to name it. That sounds fair, right?"

"You got a boy name already picked out?"

"Unfortunately, there's only been one person in my life worth naming anyone after. But it'd be a little too confusing if I named it Mokuba."

Now it was Mokuba's turn to smile.

"And I don't ever want to hear myself say, 'Mokuba, don't shit on the floor."

"Then you'd better hope it's a girl, then. Besides, I'm much better at thinking up names than you are. Remember your virtual reality simulator? Princess Edina? I mean, what were you thinking?!"

He squirted more lotion into his hands and tried to reach around to the underside of the egg. He couldn't lift it, but unfortunately, it didn't take much movement to make Seto cry out in pain.

"Sorry… it's really heavy."

"I know… that it's heavy…" Seto winced. He clenched his fists and squeezed his eyes tightly shut. A single tear ran into the pillow. "Believe me… I know…"

Mokuba wiped his hands, and then brushed the hair out of his brother's face. It was soaked with sweat.

"I know you don't like to be beaten in anything. But… promise me you won't try to hold out one day too many…"

Seto opened his eyes slowly, and looked into Mokuba's. The boy was hiding it well, but he was still afraid. Seto wondered for a brief moment what consequences he was imagining. Then he decided he'd be better off not knowing.

"Okay, Mokuba." Seto offered a smile. "I promise. Not a day more than I can actually do."


	12. Screw the labor

Seto was always one to keep a promise, but only after he pushed every limit he could think of and then a few that he couldn't think of...

He lost his appetite weeks ago, when the egg started pressing against his insides as much as it did his outsides. Now, he couldn't even take a sip of water without having it forced back up. He'd spent more than a month being out of breath. Now, his breathing was so shallow that he actually needed oxygen or he felt extremely lightheaded. Before, he could at least find some relief. Now… the thought of being without pain seemed so foreign, so unnatural, that if it went away, he might accidentally mistake himself for dead.

Of course, to someone like Seto Kaiba, none of that actually mattered. Those were all just minor details. He had money. He could pay for new organs. He could pay for machines to keep him alive for a few more days. But he'd worked too hard to just pay for a new dragon. Fortunately, he also paid other people to be concerned on his behalf.

Lee and Dr. Wu were on pins and needles. Both were to the point that they'd rather just send Seto into surgery, against his wishes. But they decided to try to win his favor anyway.

They first tried appealing to his sense of reason. Seto Kaiba was a businessman after all, and business is a world where rational arguments hold a great deal of weight. Right? Clearly, they had never been a part of one of his board meetings.

They tried fear. Unfortunately, Lee's story about a dragon egg hatching under the skin and then clawing its way out a bloody carcass didn't scare Seto. Hadn't that been a scene in a bad science fiction movie?

After that had failed, they even tried one of the most underhanded tricks in the book – sending in Mokuba, with his cute puppy-dog eyes, to persuade him. To their surprise, that worked about as well as the rational arguments.

"You know…" they heard Mokuba whisper. "The egg didn't grow as much today as it did yesterday. It might be almost done. Dr. Wu can get a surgical team prepped in minutes…"

Seto opened one eye.

"I'm sure he told you to tell me that the next time you came in, didn't he." he groaned again. "I can hold out… a little bit longer. It's just one more month… And every day counts."

Yup. Mokuba had gotten nowhere.

There was little left that they could do. If Mokuba's pleas weren't enough to sway him to throw in the towel, brute force was just about all that was left.

"Mr. Kaiba, sir…"

Dr. Wu entered the room first. He studied the various monitors, cycling between the vitals of both Seto Kaiba and the dragon. The latter was holding steady, but the former was fading fast.

"This has gone on far enough."

"Blood pressure is 145 over 93 and climbing" Lee added, walking in behind him. His nose was buried in the latest charts. "If you keep this up, you're going to give yourself a heart attack or stroke, and either of those are going to kill you. And if you die, that dragon isn't going to be far behind!"

"That egg is coming out right now, whether you like it or not!"

Dr. Wu paused, waiting for the standard retort. But one didn't come. Instead, Seto weakly opened his eyes. They were trembling, unfocused, glossed over. His head was pounding. His heart was racing. His breaths were labored. His entire body was soaked in sweat and he no longer had enough energy to move. He whispered something, but couldn't quite make the words come all the way out.

"Mr. Kaiba?"

"Sir?"

Force, it turned out, would not be necessary. The feeling of impending death would work just fine.

"… Sometimes I wonder if that's the only way he knows how to make decisions…" Dr. Wu sighed. He pressed his head against his hand for a moment. "They're all life or death."

"You should see him try to order pizza." Lee nodded, and pressed the call button. The urgency was back in his voice. "I need a surgical team. Now. Hurry! Before code Blue Eyes goes code blue! Move it! Move it!!"


	13. Screw the delivery

Mokuba sat in the hallway for what felt like an eternity. He was excited, but also scared. Hours passed, and nobody knew whether his brother, or the dragon, was all right. So he did the best thing he could do to distract himself from the possibility that they weren't – playing Nibbles on his iPhone… and trying to think of awesome dragon names, of course.

The surgery, meanwhile, was far from simple. The egg had attached itself to almost everything in Seto's abdominal cavity. Removing it was a painstaking, step-by-step procedure, in which failure could lead to puncture, perforation, and probably enough lawsuits to put everyone in the entire hospital out on the street… for at least four generations.

But all those facts aside, after seven grueling hours, Dr. Wu was finally able to see his dragon egg for the first time. As the air hit it, the shell hardened to protect what was still living inside. The egg had a cream-colored shell, speckled with light blue spots. It looked like something out of a fairy tale, and perhaps it was. They could only imagine how spectacular the dragon would be.

"It's incredible…" Lee gasped, as a team of surgeons carefully transferred the egg to a waiting incubator. They all wanted to make the transition as easy for the dragon as possible, so it was essential that they kept it warm.

"It's heavy!" one of the surgeons grunted. "That thing's got to weigh at least thirty pounds."

"35.82." a nurse corrected him. "And just under 36 inches around."

Lee was so lost in his own thoughts, that he didn't even hear them.

"It's gorgeous…" he smiled. He knew Seto would have said the same thing if he were conscious, so in a way, he was saying it for him.

"I can't believe we did it…" Dr. Wu glanced back at the operating table. His patient was still alive, but he wasn't out of the woods yet. And technically, neither were they. He hoped that hiring the best plastic surgeon in all of Japan would keep him on Seto's good side, at least for a while. Flattery might get you nowhere, but a complimentary tummy tuck just might be a deal closer.

"I can't believe HE actually did it."

"How long do you suspect until it hatches?"

"Our research suggests that the eggs weren't in the nest for very long." Lee answered. "It could be a matter of days, or maybe a couple of weeks. How long do you think we should keep it in the incubator?"

Dr. Wu thought for a while.

"Not long. Just until he wakes up."

"That'll only be a couple of hours from now..."

"I hate to admit it, but he probably knows more about how to hatch that egg than we do. After what he's been able to accomplish, I wouldn't be surprised if instinct doesn't just kick in." Dr. Wu replied. "That, and I certainly don't want to be anywhere near him if he wakes up and that egg is more than an arm's length away. Can you imagine what he'd do?"

"Point taken."


	14. Screw the morphine

Seto Kaiba awoke in his room a few hours later.

The first thing he noticed was how light he felt. The second thing he noticed was that he was able to take a deep breath for the first time in months. Then, and only then, did it actually dawn on him. Something happened. The egg was gone!

His eyes snapped open. He wrapped his arms around his stomach, only to find bandages everywhere. Dr. Wu and Lee jumped to the side of the bed, and pulled his arms back.

"Careful, Mr. Kaiba, sir. You'll rupture the sutures."

"What happened to…"

Seto didn't need to finish. He caught a glimpse of the dragon egg next to him. It had been carefully wrapped in a nest of blue blankets. His arms fell slack.

There was an uneasy silence in the room as Seto slowly reached out his hand and stroked the warm surface of his egg. It was alive. He wasn't sure how he knew that. He just did. And it made his entire body tremble with a serene sense of joy.

"Mr. Kaiba?" Dr. Wu put a hand on his shoulder. "Are you all right, sir?"

He glanced up at the doctor and his assistant. His eyes were moist and he was smiling.

It wasn't the cold, calculating smile that Lee was used to. It wasn't the kind of smile that came from winning tournaments, obliterating rival companies or stabbing the press for all it was worth. It probably wasn't the morphine either. No… This was a real smile. And on Seto Kaiba's face, it was actually a little disturbing.

"Yes." He laughed a little. "Yes, I'm fine."

He tried to sit up.

"Careful, sir. You've just been through a very complicated surgical procedure." Lee helped him sit long enough for Dr. Wu to put another pillow behind his back. He collapsed back into them slowly, and somewhat painfully.

"We did it…" he smiled.

"Yes, sir." Lee smiled back. He adjusted the IV. Everything on the monitors seemed absurdly normal, considering what they'd been through. "You gave us all quite a scare for the last week, but you should make a full recovery. In a few weeks, if there aren't any complications, you'll be cleared to go home. But you're going to have to take it easy for a while."

"Nonsense. I have a company to get back to running." Seto replied sternly, and then broke out into a wide grin. "And a dragon to raise."

"I understand sir, but…"

"Big brother!" the door swung open. You're awake!!"

Mokuba bounced past the doctors, and wrapped Seto in the biggest hug he could manage.

"He just woke up a few minutes ago." Dr. Wu answered for Seto.

"You think you're up for a little company? 'Cause there's a bunch of friends waiting to see you!"

"I think he needs a little more time to rest before…"

"Of course, I am!" Seto laughed. He waved his hand at the door and shouted, "Come on in! The baby doesn't bite… yet!"

On second thought, Lee thought to himself, maybe it is the morphine…


	15. Screw the morphine, part deux

Mokuba had already taken the liberty of calling Yugi and the rest of his friends the minute his brother was out of surgery. And it didn't take them long to gather at the hospital, weave through the media circus and raid the gift shop of every gender-neutral, species-neutral baby trinket they carried.

After what happened last time, all they could do was expect the unexpected. That, and perhaps wonder amongst themselves if he was wearing any pants.

They entered the room to find Seto propped up in bed. His entire torso was wrapped in bandages, and he was still hooked to a multitude of tubes and wires. Perhaps what surprised them most was how he looked. It was a strikingly odd combination - a mother's glow and a drunkard's grin pasted on an otherwise sickly stature. Yes, only Seto Kaiba could come out of a pregnancy even thinner than before he started it. And then there was that massive egg…

Again, there was a barrage of questions.

"Seto, how are you feeling?"

"Are you in a lot of pain?"

"You're gong to be okay, right?"

"Was that thing really inside you the whole time?!"

"How'd it get so big without you, like, exploding or something?"

"Is it going to hatch soon?"

"Do you have a name picked out?"

"Are you glad it's over?"

"Can I touch it?"

And again, Seto waited until they had all finished talking at once. He took a deep breath. Ra, he missed being able to do that…

"I'm feeling peachy. And this time I actually mean that. Pain? Nah.... God, I love drugs. Of course I'll be fine. Sure was. Isn't that something? No clue. Maybe I did and nobody told me… Lee, did I explode?"

"No, sir."

"Oh great." Seto laughed as he grinned. "I can't wait until it does hatch. I just can't wait. We won't name it until we see it. Hey, what was the next question?"

"Um, I believe it was - Are you glad it's over?" Honda repeated softly.

Seto paused for a moment.

"I guess in some ways I am, but then again… Wu, you do have more embryos, right?"

"Excuse me, Mr. Kaiba?"

"More of them!" Seto repeated as he tugged on his bandages. Lee, meanwhile, did his best to try to pry his patient's hands away from the tape and gauze. "We can't stop now. Not at just one. I've got two more in my deck, you know…"

What followed was a pregnant pause, pun very much intended. No one, not Yugi, not Mokuba, not Lee or Dr. Wu, could believe what Seto Kaiba had just said. And no one knew exactly how to respond either.

"Sir, that's absolutely out of the question." Lee attempted to reason with him.

"It's going to take years before your body has healed completely from this experiment. You are in no shape to try to repeat it."

"I have money! I can buy a new body!!" He laughed, looking peculiarly up at the ceiling.

Everyone exchanged worried glances again, before Ryou finally did something that worked. He changed the subject.

"Can I touch it? Please?"

Seto looked away from the ceiling. His train of thought left the station, going the wrong way on a one-way track.

"Of course! But be gentle. Don't you dare wake my baby."

"… I won't." Ryou smiled, petting the egg. The others joined him.

"Isn't it beautiful?" Seto grinned.

"Very." Ryou smiled back.

"I still can't believe you did it, man." Honda added.

"It is incredible."

"You'll let us know when it hatches, right?"

"Of course!" Mokuba answered. "I'll call you guys right away. I can't wait to show off my new niece or nephew!"

"And I'll give you a grand tour of the new nursery." Seto smiled. "Mokuba, Do we have a new nursery yet?"

"Isono's working on it. They just finished painting yesterday."

"Great! Let's go see it right now!" Seto tried to sit up again. He let out a weak hiss as he fell back into the pillows. "Oh, that's sore…"

"Be careful, sir…"

"Mr. Kaiba, please. You need to rest." Dr. Wu glared at the visitors. It didn't take long for them to get the hint.

"We'd better get going anyway. We've got that big test to study for." Anzu volunteered cheerily.

"Test? What test?"

Jonouchi shrieked as Anzu elbowed him in the side.

"What?! What'd I say?!"

"… never mind…"


	16. Screw the recovery

"Vultures. I swear, they're just vultures with cameras!" Dr. Wu entered Seto Kaiba's room in a huff. "I could barely get out of my car, yet alone in the building! Apparently someone started a rumor that you're going home today, and they just…"

He turned around, only to discover that the room was almost empty. The egg was still sitting its nest of blankets, but Seto wasn't in bed with it. In fact, he was nowhere to be seen.

Dr. Wu gulped. Maybe it wasn't a rumor after all.

"Um…Mr. Kaiba?"

"Just a minute." A familiar voice answered from the bathroom, followed by the flush of the toilet. The doctor let out a sigh of relief. "You don't know how good it feels to piss without a bag."

A week and a half had passed since the operation, but Seto was only beginning to heal from his ordeal.

"Yes, sir. I can imagine." Dr. Wu replied, raising his voice over the sound of the running sink. "It must also be quite a relief to have the stitches finally removed."

"You have no idea!" Seto shouted back, turning off the tap. He dried his hands on a nearby towel. "Everything's still a little tender, though."

"Well, that's to be expected. You'll probably have some soreness for at least another month… before…" The door opened, and Dr. Wu stumbled over his words.

Instead of his hospital gown, Seto was wearing a newly tailored three-piece suit. He glanced over his shoulder once more, looking in the mirror to adjust his tie, and then walked past Dr. Wu without asking forgiveness or permission.

"Hold on just a moment here… Mr. Kaiba, what are you doing?"

"Given that you said it yourself already, I found no need to be redundant." Suddenly, his tone was all business. "I'm going home."

"… Mr. Kaiba, you can't…"

"Yes, I can."

"You still need to be under medical supervision…"

"Which can be arranged in the comfort of my own home."

"You need medication."

"Which can also be arranged in the comfort of my own home. Quite easily, and with even fewer objections, I might add."

"You still have a central venous catheter in your neck!" Dr. Wu paused. He studied Seto closely. "…You didn't pull that out, did you?"

"I'm not an idiot, Dr. Wu. I can hardly eat without getting sick. It's just taped down under the jacket."

The door to his room opened again.

"Mr. Kaiba, sir, what is the meaning of this?" Lee barged in, waving a handful of legal documents. "Not only did you sign yourself out against doctor's orders, but you forged my name on your release papers!"

"Ridiculous, Lee. I have far too much money to do that myself." Seto smirked. "I hired someone to do it for me. But I'll still have need of your services, according to Dr. Wu. So you'll be staying at the mansion with me until further notice."

"Excuse me, sir?!"

"Surely, I haven't been overestimating your abilities all these months." Seto crossed his arms. For someone who still looked like he belonged in a hospital bed, he commanded a great deal of respect. His glare was not one that could be refused, especially if you wanted to keep your job, and possibly even your life.

"No, Mr. Kaiba, sir. You haven't."

"Then it's settled." He smirked, as the door opened a third time. "Just in time."

"Sorry it took me so long, big brother." Mokuba pushed a wheelchair to the side of the bed. He glanced up at the doctors, expecting about as much protest as he got from the nurses' station at the end of the hall. But they didn't say a word.

Seto winced as he slowly lowered himself down. He gestured toward the egg, and watched as Lee and Dr. Wu stumbled over themselves to assist him. After a few precarious minutes and a couple more blankets, they finally managed to arrange a nest in Seto's lap.

The doctors held their breath at first, for fear the egg might accidentally slip. Fortunately for Seto, he'd had a lot of practice keeping children still on his lap. And compared to Mokuba, the egg was smaller, lighter and didn't squirm. This part was a piece of cake.

"Ready, Seto?" Mokuba smiled, letting Lee take the handles of the wheelchair.

"Yes." He replied firmly. "Dr. Wu, why don't you go on ahead? I think it's time to herd the vultures."

Dr. Wu grumbled under his breath. He was really, _really_ starting to hate that part.

"… Yes. Right away, Mr. Kaiba."


	17. Screw everything, it's hatching!

From the moment the hospital doors opened, flashbulbs blinded anyone and everyone. All of Seto Kaiba's professional security personnel were on hand, keeping the press a safe distance from both them and the dragon. But that didn't stop reporters from trying to get an up close and personal look at the world's first Blue Eyes White Dragon egg. Questions flew in rapid succession.

"Mr. Kaiba, when will we be able to see the dragon?"

"Mr. Kaiba, are you hatching this dragon just to make it into an attraction, or do you actually plan to care for the beast?"

"Are you planning to step down as Kaiba Corporation president in order to raise the dragon? And who will be your successor?"

"Is it true that you underwent plastic surgery as well as having the dragon egg removed?"

"Mr. Kaiba, what do you have to say to those who still believe this is a massive hoax designed to sell more of your new advanced duel disk systems?"

"Enough." Seto addressed them sternly.

To Dr. Wu's surprise, they obeyed almost immediately. Pens pressed against paper, waiting for a statement. These, however, weren't exactly the questions he felt like answering.

"We're going home." He announced. "As you can see, I've had an exhausting couple of months. Therefore, I will answer any and all questions at a press conference in a couple of weeks, at which time…"

He paused, mid-sentence. Something in his lap moved.

"Time for what, Mr. Kaiba?" a couple of the journalists in the back started shouting.

"Mr. Kaiba?"

"Seto? Is something the matter?"

He didn't answer any of them. Instead, he just held the egg. It was shaking. It was hatching…

"The dragon…" Dr. Wu gasped.

It seemed all too apropos for the Blue Eyes White Dragon to be born this way, the center of attention in a carefully crafted media circus. 'Like father like son' quickly beget 'Like mother, like dragon.'

He cradled the egg as tiny cracks began to form around the top. An assassin could have leapt out in broad daylight, and he never would have known about it. He didn't notice anything – not the scramble of the journalists trying desperately to find a better vantage point, not the roar of the crowd, not even Mokuba or Dr. Wu hovering overhead. His focus was one place and one place alone, on his baby dragon.

The cracks grew larger, and after a couple of exhausting minutes, a tiny claw broke through the shell. It wrapped around the edge, trying to tear it even further. And then it cried. The shrill was reptilian, but high-pitched. It vaguely resembled the holographic design that Seto had programmed years ago, and because of that, it sounded remarkably unnatural. But to Seto, it was the most beautiful sound he'd ever heard.

"You need some help, don't you…" Seto cooed.

The dragon wailed again, perhaps in response.

He gently started to peel back the eggshell. Claws wrapped around fingers as the two worked together.

Dr. Wu was astonished how calmly maternal the CEO was. Everyone else was literally shaking with excitement as Seto finally pulled off a large piece of shell.

The dragon hid in the shell for a moment, getting accustomed to the light. But it wasn't long before it peeked its little head out. It looked up at Seto and cried. Somehow, it understood. It knew this was its mother, and it immediately felt safe, even in the middle of such a strange environment.

"Here you go. Here you go..."

Seto continued to pull apart the shell, assisting the dragon as it kicked and thrashed at the pieces.

The dragon stumbled into his lap, shaking off the rest of the shell. Seto instinctively rubbed its back. It cried, and snuggled close to Seto's chest in return.

"… wow…"

He glanced up at Dr. Wu.

"Can you tell if it's a boy or a girl?"

He and Lee were already studying the dragon as best they could.

"I think, sir." Lee answered. "I think it's a girl."

"Yes!!" Mokuba cheered.

"All right, Uncle Mokuba. You win." Seto smiled. "What are we going to name her?"

Mokuba stepped out to address the crowd. They all fell silent.

"Ladies and gentlemen, may I present, the world's first living Blue Eyes White Dragon… Kisara!!"

"Kisara?" Seto raised an eyebrow. That name was so bizarre, he wondered if Mokuba had gotten it from one of Yugi's ridiculous Egyptian fairy tales.

"You said I get to name her, big brother." Mokuba replied fiercely as he bent down to look at the dragon. He put his finger under the dragon's neck, and scratched it like one would a small dog. "Besides, I think she likes the name. You do like it. Don't you Kisara? Yes, Kisara… you do…"

He immediately regretted that.

Seto was too late to stop the baby dragon from snapping at him. Fortunately for Mokuba, she wasn't born with teeth. Unfortunately, her jaw still had the strength of a snapping turtle, and that meant he was very lucky to escape with his finger still partly attached.

"Mokuba!!" Seto shouted.

The boy screamed, and fell back against the hospital doors. The cameras zoomed in and the crowd began to roar again. Lee rushed him inside. Seto, meanwhile, closed the dragon's beak and turned its head towards him. If anyone could do that and live, it was Seto Kaiba.

"No. Kisara. We do not bite our family." He spoke softly, but sternly, to the dragon. Then he looked back at the horde that still huddled at the hospital steps. "We only bite our enemies, and reporters who don't know when to GO AWAY."

The dragon whimpered in return, and Seto released her.

He glanced at Dr. Wu, who only nodded as he turned the chair back around. The press would probably have a field day with that. The doctor waited until the hospital doors had closed before he spoke again.

In the midst of supervising the most difficult, most groundbreaking pregnancy in the history of mankind, he didn't even had time to consider what might happen if Seto actually made it through. If a developing egg was dangerous, a developing dragon was almost unfathomable. What just happened to Mokuba could easily happen to any of them… or worse…

"Mr. Kaiba, are you sure you want to go through with this?"

Seto looked down at the dragon in his lap. Kisara looked back up at him and whimpered.

"Of course. Never a doubt in my mind." Seto replied, cradling the little creature. It bit into his tie and latched onto it like a security blanket.

"Would you at least like me to have Isono fetch that binky?"

"…Shut up."


End file.
